My Own Space

I remember when I was little, I had an obsession with the concept of my own little space. Whether it be my own bedroom, a scrapbook, or a diary. I loved the idea of an area I could just be myself in. To goof around and do what I please. Escapism before I had the word for it.

Yeah lots of social media lets me customize my profile & say whatever I'm feeling, but there's always been this restriction. Not just in customization, but nowadays more sites are getting kindergarden-ized. "Oooh not allowed to cuss or not as many people can see! Can't say negative words like die or poop! If you show a knife you're flagged as sensitive content! If you show off even a little bit of chest you're porn!" Shut up. I'm not here to babysit kids. I did enough of that growing up. I'm here on the internet to be my own person when I often can't in real life.

So imagine the way my horizons opened up when I heard about Neocities. Totally free, DIY site crafting. Yeah I had to learn some code - and I'm still very much learning - but I can make a place for ME. A space on the web where I can not only share my thoughts & creations, but also arrange it however I want. I can make the site easy on my eyes by making the bulk of it tumblr blue, I can draw & add a background to the page. Every bit of text, every image, every box, all of it bends to my whim. I feel like a wizard playing with a new spellbook.

I can just do that. It took learning, like any spell, but goddam did I just cast it.
This site is still very much a work in progress, but it's still undoubtedly mine. I can format it however I like. Away from the AI powered moderation & slop machines. Away from the censorship. I can be unapologetically queer & autistic.
As seen in previous blog posts, I can be as serious, or as silly, as I so choose. Without worrying about engagement. I just forge my own spot. Make my little nest right here. If somebody happens to come by & like it, so be it. If not, here I am; making my little rat den.

Anyway, I've been playing Potion Craft lately, that game where you're an alchemist. I got further than ever before, & finally made the Philosophers Stone! Endgame time, bay bee. Just gotta make another one for the salt.
The last time I played that game, it was in it's early development. Now that it's more fleshed out, it's way more fun.

Speaking of craft, that minecraft mod Cobblemon is pretty fun. I started a save where I only use bug types, because they're my favorite. But right now, I'm testing out some add-ons for the mod. Like the one that adds legendaries. Using a new save, separate from my main in case of corruption. Separate from my bug type save because, well, none of the legendaries added are bug types. :P

I have a Vampire the Masquerade session tomorrow. I'm so excited! (As usual) My player character, Raff, is a member of the Nosferatu Clan; whose "ugly" factor is that they look horribly uncanny. They don't blink, their neck is too long & has too much skin, their hair is unyielding like plastic, and they're never as close or far as you think they are. Raff is such a fun concept to play with, especially since the uncanny valley works slightly different for me. They're also a play on how some allistic folks view people with autism as uncanny (which is frankly bullshit imo) so I lean heavy into the theme of masking. Trying to be as Normal as possible while having something obviously Wrong with them.